DIY – Ripple Socks for Superheros!

While I’ve been neglecting this blog (but for very good reason, which I promise I’ll reveal with great fanfare soon), faithful reader Jenny has been busily crocheting up a storm. She’s even made the famous Ripple Socks!

Jenny writes: “Pay no mind to the fact that these socks are worn through...”

Keep reading for her hilarious explanation of the sad state of her ripple socks.

I wear my socks hard. No, really! Sometimes, on my long treks to the store (literally: a mile.5 to get to the shopping center, who knows how much walking in & between stores, then the mile.5 back carrying, for example, 10 pounds of flour, 5 pounds of sugar, a can of coffee, some yarn perhaps, 4 pounds of dry beans, a 2 liter of soda water...), I take my shoes off because my feet have been warmly squeezed into my shoes for so long, I just gotta relieve the pressure. [edit, my feet are only squeezed in when wearing thick socks such as these] [edit 2: i only wear the socks when it's cold out] Walking on the concrete sidewalks, and sometimes in the rain, has led to the demise of these poor socks. Most of the time, though, they are house socks--worn over my sock socks.

I’m sure our gentle reader can’t help but notice that Jenny is a superhero. And clearly these socks were not designed to stand up to the rigors of a life battling crime while toting 25 lbs of groceries around. I would suggest Jenny knit her next pair out of unstable molecules (yarn available for purchase at the Baxter Building, at the corner of 42nd and Madison in NYC).

Also, you will notice that I have demonstrated in the second photo that the socks do not stay put--as exampled by the left sock. The picture with the pattern had me all excited about big tall socks that would stay up--obviously the photo is either doctored or carefully setup then quickly shot because the slightest ant fart brings them down. Not to worry though--they're just socks, after all...and they're worn through anyway. When they first started showing signs of hole making, I thought to myself, I can just seam that back together with my handy dandy, uh, fixing things skills. More time passed and there were more long treks to the store with more concrete walkin' in my stockin's, and the holes just blew out irrationally.

I suspect supervillains were involved.

Don't know if I'll ever fix them, but boy do I enjoy wearing them! I made them! They're the first I've made in the sock-genre, so I'm sure there will be others.

One thing I will say as a note to others who may wish to produce these fine foot clothings is that the pattern only leads you up to the ankle. They say to repeat the last round until 18 somethings have been made or to desired length. Once again, the picture to accompany is misleading, and I think that's filthy. Not as filthy as making people believe the socks will stay up though. No hard feelings, honest. I did have a little, "whaaat?" about the heel, but I was new at crochet in general, and obviously I got through it :)

Jenny also included this important disclaimer.

p.s. there have not been any recorded incidents of seizures induced by my wearing of these socks.......for the record.

That would be for the official record, I’m sure. Those in the know are well aware zigzags (AKA ripples) were standard issue for super heroines in the sixties.

This “Vintage Super Hero Dress” will go beautifully with Jenny’s Ripple Socks, sending villains into helpless convulsions for miles around!


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DIY – A Revolutionary Birthday!

Thanks to my friend, Hind of Alexandria, Egypt, we have a brand new DIY!

This lovely young lady is Wa’ad, who longtime readers may remember for her lovely purse and cloche hat. Above, she’s working on a very special, one could say, revolutionary doily.

For the whole story:

Hind writes:

Dear Victoria,

I am glad to be able to send some photos of Wa'ad, (who is now fourteen years old) while she was working on a doily she made last month for her mother's birthday. This birthday present is a Handmade by Daughter from a Handmade by Mother pattern posted on August 6, 2009, called: Summer of Polyester Love.

How well I remember the Summer of Polyester Love. When for one brief, wacky moment I actually thought slapping a doily onto a dress made sense.

Good times, good times.

How this pattern was transformed into a doily has a remarkable story. It seems that Wa'ad had actually planned to buy a present for her mother's birthday which was on February 7, but as this was during the revolution, most of the shops were closed, and the curfew regulations did not allow her the chance to go on the streets and search for something nice. So she came to me five days before the birthday was due, asking for a quick and easy pattern to make her first thread crochet project.

Again – as often before – Handmade by Mother had the right solution. In three days the doily was complete, with enough time to be starched and blocked.

A big, gushing puddle of glee describes my reaction to the possibility that my silly blog was able to contribute positively in any teeny tiny way to people’s lives during the Egyptian revolution.

While I mop my glee off the floor, please enjoy this picture of the actual doily.

Squee!

Of course her mother was much more delighted with that handmade present than she would have ever been with any other ready made thing, bought on the last moment.

The doily is worked following the pattern, but it has a simple border on the last three rounds, which can be easily done by counting the stitches on the photo.

Excellent work, Wa’ad, your doily is so pretty! And it’s much nicer and more useful in its present incarnation, than the original sewn into that tacky blouse and skirt.

The cat beside Wa'ad is called Didi. He was put before my door last June by somebody who seems to have been unable to keep him. When I opened the door he just came in, with the intention of staying. He is very calm and friendly as you can notice from the photos.

Didi is adorable. One of my own cats arrived on our doorstep in much the same manner.

I hope that you like that DIY which really saved the day.

With love, Hind.

Like it? I love it!

Who could have ever imagined an unfortunate pattern in a 1975 Ladies’ Home Journal would result in a beautiful birthday present in 2011 revolutionary Egypt?

Thank you, Hind and Wa’ad!

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DIY – Poodle Party Crashers

“La-la-la,” sang Miss Tissue-Poo. “I love my new friend, Miss Spray-Poo! She’s a hair-spray cozy and she keeps me safe from Mr. Fishy Fangs. You can find her marvellously uncomplicated pattern right here.”

“Excuse me, but I’m much to cool for old-fashioned hairspray,” said Miss Spray-Poo. “My insides are a tall, slim bottle of Aussie Sydney Smooth Heat Protector. When the heat is on, be smooth.”

“Miss Spray-Poo’s made from the very finest left-over pink acrylic worsted-weight yarn scraps, doubled up so no one will suspect you use cheap, foreign hair spray,” continued Miss Tissue-Poo.

“I told you it’s not hairspray,” insisted Miss Spray-Poo. “And who are you talking to?”

“She may not look like much at first,” Miss Tissue-Poo burbled happily, “but once you tie on the extra-thick pompoms (be sure to do MANY more wraps than the pattern calls for) Miss Spray-Poo’s a perky poodle princess.”

“That’s it,” said Miss Spray-Poo, neither perky nor a princess. “I need a drink!”

Where will Miss Spray-Poo find a stiff drink?

Suddenly, a stranger appeared in the bathroom.

“That’s no stranger,” exclaimed Miss Spray Poo. “She’s my old friend, Nearly Headless Fifi. Now here’s a gal who knows how to party hard!”

“I don’t think we’re allowed to hold parties in the powder room,” said Miss Tissue-Poo, uncomfortably.

“Look at me,” shouted Miss Spray-Poo. “I’m not Nearly Headless, I’m Totally Headless! Woo-hoo!”

“Yeah, but I brought the booze!” retorted Fifi, flinging her head off with a flourish.

“Hurray!” said Miss Spray-Poo.

“Horrors,” gasped Miss Tissue-Poo. “The bathroom is packed with decapitated barfly poodles! What will people think?”

Everyone ignored Miss Tissue-Poo, and the Poodle Party proceeded apace. Eventually, Miss Tissue-Poo loosened up enough to ask Mr. Fishy Fangs to dance. He ignored her, as he’s in a committed relationship with the Bathroom Wall.

Will more Poodles crash this party? Stay tuned!

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DIY – The Harrowing Adventures of Miss Tissue-Poo

Miss Tissue-Poo is pleased to make her bathroom debut! She was crocheted from the very finest acrylic yarn, and has eight of the finest extra-fluffy pompoms. Her eyes are two blue buttons which complement her ribbon, and her nose was embroidered with a scrap of shiny pink yarn. She’s too much of a lady to stick a red felt tongue out at people using the powder room, so I ignored that part of her pattern.

Above, Miss Tissue-Poo discreetly keeps my spare roll of toilet paper under wraps, so my family and guests won’t be offended by the sight of something so uncouth. However, she seems a little worried about that deep sea fishy behind her...

What's that fish doing? To find out:

“Help!” Miss Tissue-Poo shrieks. “A horrible monster is nibbling on my top-knot! My precious, precious top knot!”

Poor Miss Tissue-Poo. Her legs are short and fluffy, so she can’t run away. She never expected that protecting toilet paper rolls would be fraught with peril.

“Oh, thank goodness!” says Miss Tissue-Poo as a new poodle joins her. “Now that you’re here, I’m sure I’ll be safe.”

“Whatever,” says Miss Spray-Poo, dismissively.

“You’re my hero!” gushes Miss Tissue-Poo.

“Do I even know you?”

I’m afraid Miss Spray-Poo is not a well-bred lady like our dear Miss Tissue-Poo.

But who is this rude poodle? And will she heroically guard Miss Tissue-Poo’s honour from Mr. Fishy Fangs, and more importantly, her precious top knot? The answers to these questions and many more are coming soon to a DIY post near you!


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It’s a two-in-one post for a two-in-one Jaunty cap!

Here is thirteen year old Jamie modeling his Handmade-by-his-own-Mother Jaunty cap, in a take-no-prisoners shade of emergency orange. I think he’s got a certain Harry Callahan air about him. “Do ya feel jaunty? Well, do ya, punk?”

Faithful readers may be wondering if they’ve missed the jaunty post for this DIY. However fear not, the pattern for this sixties stocking cap hasn’t been mocked...yet!

But thanks to Jamie’s talented and generous mother, Lisa, we can all make Jaunty caps of our own.

Read on for the complete pattern (and more commentary from the peanut gallery!):

Jaunty Cap pattern from Beehive Family Headwear & Scarves, c. 1965

Though I’ve been calling this a Jaunty cap, technically it’s also a Jaunty scarf. This space age Sixties design makes it possible to simultaneously wear it on your head and wrap it around your neck.

Which is why this Beehive pattern is simply named...

Jaunty

MATERIALS: Patons Canadiana Superwash Wool or Patons Candiana Sayelle (50 g): 3 balls main colour 8. 2 balls contrasting colour A. Two 3 14 mm (No. 10) and two 4 mm (No. 8) Milward knitting needles or whichever needles you require to produce the tension given below.

TENSION: 5 1/4 sts and 6 1/2 rows – 1 inch (2.5 cm) with 4 mm (No. 8) needles in stocking st.

SIZE: To fit 21-22 inch (53-56 cm) head size.

The pattern designer wants you to believe that wrapping this long, winding hat around your neck will prevent you from getting a sore throat. However, if you’re not careful, you could end up with a permanent sore throat à la Isadora Duncan.

Beginning at cuff with B and 3 1/4 mm (No. 10) needles, cast on 108 sts.
Work 6 ins (15 cm) in (K2, P2) ribbing. Break B.

Note: Hat is worked in alternating stripes of 4 ins (10 cm) colour A and 4 ins (10 cm) colour B, joining and breaking colours as required.

Change to 4 mm (No. 8) needles and work 2 1/2 ins (6 cm) stocking st ending with purl row.

Of course, tough guys laugh in the face of danger!

1st decreasing row: (K16. K2tog) 6 times. Work 7 rows even.
2nd decreasing row: (K2tog. K15) 6 times. Work 7 rows even.
3rd decreasing row: (K14. K2tog) 6 times. Work 7 rows even. (90 sts on needle).
4th decreasing row: (K2tog. K7) 10 times. Work 7 rows even.
5th decreasing row: (K6. K2tog) 10 times. Work 9 rows even.
6th decreasing row: (K2tog. K5) 10 times. (60 sts on needle). Work 19 rows even.

Lisa also knitted another version of this cap for a friend of hers using the original stripe pattern. I really like how she substituted a tassel for the pompon with both hats.

She wrote, “How great would it look if you were to put an edging on it along the seam to make it look like a dinosaur's tail ... hmmm ... Lots of ways to make this one look unique!”

7th decreasing row: (K2tog. K10) 5 times. Work 19 rows even.
8th decreasing row: (K9. K2tog) 5 times. Work 19 rows even.
9th decreasing row: (K2tog. K8) 5 times. Work 19 rows even.
10th decreasing row: (K7. K2tog) 5 times. Work 19 rows even.
11th decreasing row: (K2tog. K6) 5 times. Work 19 rows even.
12th decreasing row: (K5. K2tog) 5 times. Work 19 rows even.
13th decreasing row: (K2tog. K4) 5 times. Work 19 rows even.
14th decreasing row: (K3. K2tog) 5 times. (20 sts on needle). Work 9 rows even.

I agree! For instance, if you happen to know a tough guy who’s also a Harry Potter fan, you can always knit a striped hat in his Hogwarts house colours.

For the record: Gryffindor is red and gold, Slytherin is green and silver, Hufflepuff is black and yellow, and Ravenclaw is blue and bronze.

Proceed:–
1st row: (K2tog. K2) 5 times. Work 9 rows even.
11th row: (K1. K2tog) 5 times. Work 9 rows even.
21st row: (K2tog) 5 times. Break yarn. Thread end through remaining sts. Draw up and fasten securely. Sew back seam. Make pompon as given on page 6. Sew to point of hat.

Yes, I know the movies depicted Ravenclaw colours as blue and silver. The movieverse is wrong, okay? Only the books are CANON!

Pompon

Wind yarn around 3 fingers approx. 75 times, depending on desired thickness of pompon. Remove fingers and tie yarn tightly in centre. Cut through each side of loops. Trim to a smooth round shape.

Ahem. When you’re done making a totally-not-geeky Harry Potter stocking cap (with or without pompon!) for yourself, you can also make one for your jaunty cat.

Trust me, that’s gratitude in his eyes.

Click here for the printable pattern.


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DIY – Happy Mawlid!

In celebration of Mawlid, the Prophet’s Birthday, Faithful Reader (and Master Crocheter!) Hind of Alexandria Egypt has sent us a charming little tale.

It all starts with a suave, blue Jinni, sitting among the branches of a tree, enjoying the warm afternoon sun.

Read on to discover which vintage pattern inspired this Jinni!

Believe it or not, our blue Jinni began with this hideous, Halloween Curtain Pull!

Hind writes, “As I always like to use patterns from the blog – or parts of them – I used the pattern of the little demon curtain pull. I added legs wearing wide trousers instead of the tail, and a more handsome face...”

Extraordinarily handsome! I’m in awe of Hind’s embroidery skills.

“...with his ears in their right place. As he has no hands in the pattern, I made him look as if he is putting them in his pockets. His complexion is blue, because there is a common Egyptian expression, which is said when some task is very difficult: "Not even the blue Jinn can do this!" That gave me the idea of making him blue, but I had not the heart to make him ridiculous or ugly. Jinn have their pride; in fact they are very proud and are easily offended. That is how the folk tales, like 1001 Nights, represent them.”

But what’s this? It seems our Jinni has just spotted a bewildered gingerbread tourist holding the map of Egypt.

Oh my goodness, just look at this Gingy’s sweet smile! And his wee pink camera! And his tiny little thumbs! He’s so adorable I’m going to run out of exclamation points soon!

If you squint, you can see a vague family resemblance to the original Gingerbread Man:

Hind’s Gingerbread Man is clearly the handsome one in his family.

“The gingerbread tourist is asking if anybody can tell him where to find one of his far relatives. She’s called the sugar doll, and while he’s never met her in person, he has seen her once on an Egyptian post stamp. (He is sure that they are relatives because they both have sugar among their ingredients).”

“The jinni tells him that he is lucky, because he came at the right time to find a sugar doll, as today is "Mawlid al Nabii".”

Sugar dolls are a traditional treat at Mawlid, along with sugar horses for little boys. Here’s a picture of an Egyptian Mawlid celebration. Looks like lots of fun!

“The Jinni offers to take Gingerbread Man to meet her, and brings him a horse to ride. On their way they get a basket full of flowers for her.”

Clearly, Gingerbread Man is a perfect gentleman, who wouldn’t dream of going to meet his hostess, the sugar doll, with empty hands. Hind crocheted this little basket full of flowers using the towel basket pattern as inspiration.

And if you think all three of these DIYs are amazing, just wait until you see the next one!

“The Sugar Doll welcomes her guest and offers him hummus and sweets, made of coconuts, peanuts, chick peas and sesame seeds, all mixed with sugar caramel.”

But, of course, Gingy couldn’t eat them right away, because he was so stunned by her beauty he fell off his horse and had to be revived with coffee. And who can blame him?

Hind used part of a breastplate pattern for the two small fans, and last year’s Kwanzaa motif for the bigger fan behind her head. Apparently real sugar dolls always have a bright coloured piece of crepe-paper tied to their backs to hide the fan's handle. So Hind made something like this with red yarn, using the net stitch from “Fifty ways to net a lover”.

“Before leaving, Gingerbread Man gets a sack full of hummus, and a silver "Khamsa we Khmeesa" to protect him from any envious person who may look at him with an evil eye. (The jinni is wearing a golden Khamsa brooch.)”

I think the Sugar Doll looks a little sad to see Gingerbread Man leaving so soon. He’ll have to visit Egypt again, some time soon!

“And finally, here’s the jinni sitting in the midst of hummus, with a cup of coffee on his lap.”

I think Hind deserves a cup of coffee and a plate of sweets, as well! She’s created a gorgeous set of characters, out of a very sketchy collection of patterns.

Kudos as well to Mona, Wa’ad and Heba for the beautiful photography and set design, and a happy Mawlid to all!

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DIY - Will the real Victoria Dunn please stand up?

Is this Victoria Dunn? In her Little Girl party mask?

The Faux Book Launch was a roaring success, and Victoria Dunn’s actual identity was finally revealed!

Or... was it?

 

This is clearly not Victoria Dunn. It’s just her brain, before the party.

See? Here’s Victoria’s brain at the party. Along with Victoria’s zombie eyeballs (AKA tomato aspic a la 1950’s cookbook), Sputnik Surprise, and just a glimpse of Rampaging Pear Mice laying siege to a molded green Jell-o salad. It’s molded, not moldy.

Mmm! Fifties food!

It’s Jell-o-rific!

Please take special note of the cake in corner – it’s actually made of alternating layers of tuna salad, egg salad and white bread, frosted all over with cream cheese. It was yummy!

No, really! I’m very grateful to Faithful Reader Adrienne for the Sandwich Cake. Also not-so-Faithful Reader Lisa provided the punch, which was also delicious, and not the least bit spiked. So far as I could tell.

So... was that really Victoria Dunn above? Or is this Victoria Dunn?

May... be. But there’s also this strong contender:

I think the hat is quite dashing!

Wait, there’s MORE Victoria Dunns?

My, my, Victoria Dunn’s looking a wee bit masculine.

Maybe she’s just forgotten to shave her wrists?

Okay, that’s definitely NOT Victoria Dunn!

Although, I wouldn’t say that to his face. At least, not while he’s wearing that scary mask.

However, I’m happy to say that masked maniacs were not the only guests at this party.

It looks like every one of Ooky’s friends crashed the party! Stay tuned for a sexy photo shoot, when they get their own DIY.

Also, note the beady fringes on the left and the mysterious afghan on the right – bet you a shiny nickel you can’t guess which patterns these came from! The answers will be revealed soon.

Also coming soon...

Spats!

Because a party’s not rocking until the spats come out.

So, thank you again to Collected Works, and to all the wonderful folks who came to my party, friends both old and new.


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DIY - Happy Flag Day!

Today, February 15th, is the National Flag Day of Canada. On this day in 1965, our maple leaf flag was born.

In honor of this occasion, Gingy the Gingerbread Man will be going on a sightseeing trip to Parliament Hill in Ottawa. After all, it’s not the strangest thing Canadians have ever done to celebrate this holiday.

Yes, that’s Darth Vader. Marching in a 1979 Flag Day parade. Because no one represents “Canada” better than a homicidal maniac from a galaxy far, far away.

For more Flag Fun:

Here’s Gingy, contemplating the trek out to Parliament Hill. Looks mighty cold out there!

It’s not a good sign when the bus stop has frosted over. Better dress warm, Gingy!

Here’s Gingy and a friend, in front of the War Memorial. Gingy is sporting a patriotic white sweater with a red maple leaf, a matching red scarf and touque. Gingy’s friend is wearing everything she could find in her closet. According to the weather forecast, it’s so cold exposed flesh can freeze within minutes.

Luckily, Gingy’s made of sterner stuff, and isn’t at all bothered by his lack of pants.

Here’s Gingy on Parliament Hill, admiring the Centennial (but not Eternal!) Flame. You can just see it flickering around the nipple-shaped fountain behind him.

Gingy’s sweater was knitted in stockinette stitch with k 1, p 1 ribbing at his sleeve cuffs and waist. The maple leaf on Gingy’s sweater was done in duplicate stitch, while his scarf was constructed using a simple garter stitch. Everything about him is made of Red Heart Supersaver yarn, so he’s not the slightest bit concerned about catching fire. His acrylic polymers are flame resistant. As well as sunlight, oxygen and fashion resistant.

Gingy is a big fan of Canadian hero Terry Fox!

Pay no attention to the Olympic Countdown in the background. These photos were taken today! Honest!

Okay, they were taken on January 30th. Gingy couldn’t get time off work to visit Parliament Hill on the actual Flag Day.

It’s not easy being the Canadian Gingerbread Ambassador! One of the primary job qualifications is an excellent sense of balance. There would be nothing more embarrassing than landing face first in the snow in front of French-Canadian soldier, Sieur d'Iberville.

Luckily, Gingy can always count on his friends to offer a helping hand. Just like Joseph Brant offered a helping hand to the British during a little tiff known as the American Revolution.

And finally, here’s Gingy having a friendly word with Sir Arthur William Currie a Canadian General who kicked serious butt during W.W.I. It would have been nice to have included photos of all of Canada’s Valiants, but my camera kept dying from the cold. That’s what happens when electronics are designed in warmer countries such as Japan. They just don’t take into account temperatures below 20 degrees Celsius (that’s -4 Fahrenheit for all you American readers).

Due to a public scandal involving an unidentified gingerbread hottie, Gingy’s present whereabouts are unknown. He was last spotted in New York State, but he’s believed to have family as far away as Egypt. Hopefully we’ll hear more about Gingy being on the lam, soon!

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