Jenny writes: “Pay no mind to the fact that these socks are worn through...”
Keep reading for her hilarious explanation of the sad state of her ripple socks.
I wear my socks hard. No, really! Sometimes, on my long treks to the store (literally: a mile.5 to get to the shopping center, who knows how much walking in & between stores, then the mile.5 back carrying, for example, 10 pounds of flour, 5 pounds of sugar, a can of coffee, some yarn perhaps, 4 pounds of dry beans, a 2 liter of soda water...), I take my shoes off because my feet have been warmly squeezed into my shoes for so long, I just gotta relieve the pressure. [edit, my feet are only squeezed in when wearing thick socks such as these] [edit 2: i only wear the socks when it's cold out] Walking on the concrete sidewalks, and sometimes in the rain, has led to the demise of these poor socks. Most of the time, though, they are house socks--worn over my sock socks.I’m sure our gentle reader can’t help but notice that Jenny is a superhero. And clearly these socks were not designed to stand up to the rigors of a life battling crime while toting 25 lbs of groceries around. I would suggest Jenny knit her next pair out of unstable molecules (yarn available for purchase at the Baxter Building, at the corner of 42nd and Madison in NYC).
Also, you will notice that I have demonstrated in the second photo that the socks do not stay put--as exampled by the left sock. The picture with the pattern had me all excited about big tall socks that would stay up--obviously the photo is either doctored or carefully setup then quickly shot because the slightest ant fart brings them down. Not to worry though--they're just socks, after all...and they're worn through anyway. When they first started showing signs of hole making, I thought to myself, I can just seam that back together with my handy dandy, uh, fixing things skills. More time passed and there were more long treks to the store with more concrete walkin' in my stockin's, and the holes just blew out irrationally.I suspect supervillains were involved.
Don't know if I'll ever fix them, but boy do I enjoy wearing them! I made them! They're the first I've made in the sock-genre, so I'm sure there will be others.Jenny also included this important disclaimer.
One thing I will say as a note to others who may wish to produce these fine foot clothings is that the pattern only leads you up to the ankle. They say to repeat the last round until 18 somethings have been made or to desired length. Once again, the picture to accompany is misleading, and I think that's filthy. Not as filthy as making people believe the socks will stay up though. No hard feelings, honest. I did have a little, "whaaat?" about the heel, but I was new at crochet in general, and obviously I got through it :)
p.s. there have not been any recorded incidents of seizures induced by my wearing of these socks.......for the record.That would be for the official record, I’m sure. Those in the know are well aware zigzags (AKA ripples) were standard issue for super heroines in the sixties.
This “Vintage Super Hero Dress” will go beautifully with Jenny’s Ripple Socks, sending villains into helpless convulsions for miles around!
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Glad to see you back. You've been missed.
ReplyDeleteThank you! I'm glad to be back. :-)
ReplyDeletethe glory!
ReplyDeletemight have to make me a matching dress! Although I bet a clashing dress would have an even better (read: worse) effect on the pesky villains...
--jenny
So happy to see a post from you, superhero, indeed. Awesome socks, thanks for profiling such a groovy person!!!!
ReplyDeletehm, thanks!
ReplyDeleteJenny needs a true Superhero name.. perhaps Justice Jenny.. fighting crime and grime even while shopping!
ReplyDeletemy boyfriend said he's gonna start calling me Vinegirl--since I use vinegar for almost everything: washing my hair, laundry, all-purpose cleaning agent, brew for when i'm sick...That's a pretty decent superhero name..
ReplyDelete--jenny
or Vinegirl
Karen and Anony, you're welcome! :-)
ReplyDeleteBunnie - that's a great tag, "Fighting Crime and Grime!" Should be on a tee shirt.
Jenny, I mean, Vinegirl, I once made the mistake of using red wine vinegar for housecleaning. My entire home smelled like an LCBO store (Liquor Control Board of Ontario). :-p Didn't really think that one through...
haha! That fighting crime and grime tee shirt sounds like a winner!!
ReplyDeleteaw! the red wine vinegar makes for a good story! My red wine vinegar story is that my college roommate was surprising me with a cake and friends for my birthday one year, and when I was going to the grocery store, I asked her if there was anything I could pick up for her, on her list was basically everything she needed to bake my cake--and red wine vinegar was on the list. It was the first I'd heard of it, and I bought it along with sugar and probably chocolate for the cake....and I STILL didn't know she was baking me a cake--but I didn't know what red wine vinegar was....so that's probably why I didn't figure it out...plus, my birthday was in August and this was the end of september--school started & ended later for us ;)
in other thoughts, I was thinking about something, and then I was like,no, they'll mock me. Then I thought, "If you don't want the Canadians to mock you, don't talk to them." ha! is this true? canadians mock--I've begun noticing this...
jenny
Jenny, yes Canadians mock. It helps us survive the long, cold winters and is a well-known cure for frostbite. ;-)
ReplyDelete